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Swimming Trunks


If you've never worried about what your swim trunks look like, consider this: Sharks are 20 times more likely to attack swimmers who wear boring shorts. OK, we made that up, but it sounds legit. Just to be on the safe side, you should definitely invest in a pair of our swimming trunks. They're loud enough to scare away a hammerhead!
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Swimming Trunks | Men's Swimming Trunks

Swimming trunks have come a long way in the last hundred and fifty years. Back in the 1850s, when men and women started sharing public beaches in the US, a dude was expected to wear a tunic top and shorts to his knees. Thankfully, those days are long behind us and you can wear pretty much whatever you want these days. Still, a racy banana hammock is probably not the most comfortable way to go. Most guys (and elves) prefer a good, sturdy pair of men's swimming trunks. The savvy swimmer can make a statement with some of the designs in this collection.

First off, you need a special pair of men's small swim trunks for any water athletics. You'll love our team USA themed men's swimming trunks with their bold blue and white stars and stripes pattern. Remember, horizontal stripes make things look wider. That means your thighs will look like you've been doing some serious body building when you wear these bathing suits for men. Tie a patriotic bandana around your head and hum "Eye of the Tiger" to put you in the right frame of mind to dominate on the water volleyball scene. Just don't get carried away and spike the ball onto anyone's head. That's not what the Tipsy Elves would want.

For a patchwork look that's practically a work of art, try our red and aqua men's swimming trunks with their variegated triangles. They almost have the appearance of semaphore flags. Let's guess what they are trying to say. How about: "Help us, we've gotten lost on our way to Grandma's quilting circle." Or maybe, "We're confused about this whole right angle business. Why can't we all just be equilateral?"

Is something eating your shorts? It's probably the school of menacing piranha we couldn't resist printing on these ferocious swimming trunks. They turn neon colors when they get especially hungry. Just hope there are no cattle coming down to the river to drink when you are wearing this primal swimwear. The temptation to snack on some "hamburger on the hoof" can be surprisingly strong.

You know it's not smart to swim when there's a thunderstorm brewing. But it's OK to make your own lightning with our thunderbolt swimwear. These swim shorts for sale are sure to light up your summer time with their bold aqua and yellow zig zags on a multi-hued background. We stole the lightning bolts from Zeus back in the eighties when he was distracted by our big hair, so don't let him catch you wearing these board shorts for women. He might want them back.

That's just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to enjoying our swimwear line. We know you'll enjoy diving in and choosing the perfect design for your summer. One thing is for certain, you'll be a fashion standout on the beach, at the pool, or at the Fourth of July picnic with family and friends. It's great to be a style rebel with Tipsy Elves men's swimming trunks and boardshort. When you're with us, you'll never feel alone.

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